It has been a goal of mine since being married to learn as much as possible about what it means to be a Godly woman and wife. I have been devoting a lot of time and effort to this study, listening to sermons, searching the Bible, and reading books and blogs. It is the strong desire of my heart to be a good wife and eventually a good mother... To take care of my home and my family in the best way possible. As I learn more, I have had to wage a battle against the thoughts and teachings of the world. I have a fierce independent streak. I went to college, graduated with honors, lived on my own, and have a very prestigious and successful career. Yet the bible teaches submission, selflessness, and service. It teaches that the woman is to be her husband's helper, that she is the weaker vessel. Honestly, some of these things are hard for me to swallow. And yet, I want to be the woman God created me to be.
At the suggestion of David Platt from the past Secret Church we attended, I am currently reading The Excellent Wife by Martha Peace. I am only a few chapters in, but it is a very interesting and challenging book. Tonight, I came across this page. "18 Ways a Wife May be the Glory of Her Husband." I would like to know what you think.
Those of you who are older and wiser, or not, I'd like to hear your thoughts. Men or women, it doesn't matter. To be honest, some of these suggestions struck a nerve with me. I kind of felt like I was reading a 1943 "Good Housekeeping" article. Do you agree, or is this another area where I need to readjust my focus and humble myself to see what God is trying to teach me?
Leave a comment, and let's get a good discussion going!
***Update: I found a link to the list, for those of you who can't read the picture.
5 comments:
This is something I am struggling with, too. I have had a hard time letting go of my independence and, well, selfishness. Eep.
As for the list you posted, I wasn't able to read all of it, but I also cringed at some of the things I was able to make out.
Update: I Googled the list and read it to Richey to get a male's perspective. He said some of it was right on (numbers 1-3 and 8, for example), but other things seemed outdated (like recording your husband's telephone messages -- haha!). He also pointed out that some of the things (namely, number 10) are true, but should be reciprocal.
I'd say if you're looking for ways to serve and minister to your husband, this list definitely gives ways to do that. Yes, most of these should be recipricated (and if I am working full time, it is not my duty alone to do the house work and cooking). In fact, I'd like to be treated this way for the most part. But I think when we're looking to serve someone, we probably shouldn't be worrying about how they should serve us back. It should be selfless. I have a hard time with this. I tend to feel that if I'm treating someone in a particular way, they should treat me in a similar manner, but if Christ is our example, we see that he sacrificed himself for us when we definitely don't deserve it and will never be able to repay him. I think the problem comes when a husband demands these things from his wife, but that can go both ways.
Jennifer, I've written a reply several times and just can't get my words right. I'm going to have to pray it through a little more. I know this my flesh screams, "NOOOOO!!!" However, my heart tells me that there are things on this list that I know I should be doing that I'm not. I often want to serve in some romantically, noble way, and yet I wince at sacrificing my pride to serve my husband. How pathetic is that?
I found a link to the list for those of you who are having trouble reading the picture. It's added to the original post.
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