Mended

Love is patient and kind, it keeps no record of wrongs. This verse has been playing over and over in my mind for a couple days now. Patient. Kind. Forgiving. I think it's the last one that I'm getting hung up on.

Forgiveness is a strange character. We are reluctant to forgive.

• "But you don't know what they've done to me!"

• "If I forgive them, then I'm saying it's ok."

• "I'm just not ready."

Forgiveness means we have to let it go. We have to open our hands and our hearts and let go of the hurt, the pain, and the wrongs we have suffered. I'm not sure what about this is so bad. Is it the fact that we have to first acknowledge it in order to let it go? Do we feel like if we forgive, then it's over, and we have to pretend like everything's ok? Or is it that in the act of forgiveness, we have to say that we are fine, and it wasn't a big deal, when in reality, it was?

Perhaps, it is our view of forgiveness that is skewed...

According to Wikipedia (so it must be true!): Forgiveness is typically defined as the process of concluding resentment, indignation or anger as a result of a perceived offense, difference or mistake, and/or ceasing to demand punishment or restitution.

WOW

Now, there's a thought. Not lessening the offense. Not erasing the consequences of the wrong committed. But instead, letting go and moving on. Realizing that we all have sinned, fallen short, made mistakes. It doesn't change what happened, but it does make moving on a lot easier. Especially when you consider the "forces" at work. Satan is powerful, crafty, and convincing. He warps, distorts, perverts. And while we are not powerless to fight this, it makes it more understandable when someone you love fails.

It is this understanding that changes your perspective. You are more able to forgive, when you realize what the person who has wronged you is going through. I think that is what makes forgiveness possible. When as Atticus Finch says you, "put on their skin and walk around in it a while." When the object of your forgiveness is truly repentant, and hurting for what they've done, how do you have a choice but to forgive?

Love is more important. Repairing a bruised relationship is what matters. Getting over yourself, working through your pain, and moving on...these are the steps to take. Most likely, the other person needs your help. Do they matter enough to you to move on? Holding on to the hurt only causes bitterness, and really, who needs that? The forgiveness is just as much for you as it is for the other person.

I came across this song this morning, and it really hit home for me. Thanks be to God for His unfailing love and mercy. Praise the Lord that He applies these same principles to our relationships too... that he repairs and restores.

Forgiveness... it's worth it.


You repair all that we have torn apart and
You unveil a new beginning in our hearts and
We stand grateful for all that has been left behind and
All that goes before us

You've got all things suspended
All things connected
Nothing was forgotten
'Cause your love is perfect
You are our healer
And you know what's broken
And we're not a mystery to you

We will dance 'cause you restore the wasted years and
You will sing over all our coming fears and
We'll stand grateful for all that has been left behind and all that goes before us

Lord, you mend the breech
And you break every fetter
You give us your best, but what we thought was better
And you are to be praised